Indian Hindu marriage step by step

A Step-by-Step Guide to a Traditional Indian Hindu Wedding: Customs & Rituals

This detailed guide explores the intricate and beautiful customs of a traditional Indian Hindu wedding, specifically focusing on the rituals prevalent in Daivajnya Brahmin marriages. Understanding these steps offers insight into the rich cultural heritage and significance of this important life event.

Pre-Wedding Rituals & Arrangements:

The journey begins long before the wedding day itself. It starts with the proposal, where the bride's parents formally propose a match. A crucial step involves comparing the horoscopes (Kundli) of the bride and groom to ensure compatibility. If the horoscopes align, the parents proceed with settling the marriage.

The Betrothal (Soiriki):

This joyous ceremony marks the official engagement. The groom's family visits the bride's home, adorning her with flowers. Devakarya (prayers to the family deity) and Udid (a ritual involving the pulse of the lentil, offered to Lord Ganesha) ceremonies are performed at both houses.

Wedding Day – A Day of Sacred Rituals:

The wedding day is filled with auspicious rituals, each carrying deep symbolic meaning.

• Morning Prayers & Welcoming: A Pandit (priest) arrives at the bride's home to perform a prayer for a smooth ceremony. Elderly relatives are invited to participate in this early morning session. The bride touches the feet of elders, and the wedding party proceeds to the wedding hall (Mantap). The bride typically wears a simple sari for this phase.

• Inviting the Groom's Party: The bride's brother or maternal uncle formally invites the groom's family to the wedding hall, accompanied by sweets, flowers, and small gifts for children.

• Phool Muddi (Flower & Ring): A bachelor, called the "Dhedo" (or a young eligible bachelor in modern times), sits with the groom. The bride's father washes the groom's feet, places a gold ring on his finger, and ties a sacred thread (Peta) around him. He is then adorned with an Aarti (ceremonial waving of incense) and offered sweets and milk. The Dhedo receives a gift. A female counterpart, the "Dhedi," follows a similar ritual.

• Breakfast & Preparations: The wedding party enjoys the first breakfast. The bride changes into her wedding attire.

• Ghade Udhak (Water Clock): Traditionally used to mark time, this ritual now serves a symbolic purpose. Five women (bride, mother, groom's mother, and two others) hold copper pots filled with water and perform Ganga Pooja (prayer to the river Ganga).

• Udida Moorth (Grinding of Gram): The bride and her mother jointly grind a mixture of green gram, black gram, turmeric, and oil. The significance of this ritual is often debated, but it is a cherished tradition.

• Kaashi Yatra (Renunciation): A playful ritual where the groom pretends to renounce worldly life and intends to go to Kaashi (Varanasi). He is persuaded by the bride's father to continue with married life.

• Go Daan (Gift the Pandit a Cow): Traditionally, a cow was gifted to the Pandit. Nowadays, this is often symbolic, with cash or clothing offered instead.

• Aarti & Pradakshina: Aarti is performed for the groom's sisters, the groom, and the Dhedo, followed by a Pradakshina (walking in a circle) around the Homa Kund (sacred fire).

• Preparing the Talee (Wedding Plates): Two plates are prepared:

  • Plate 1 (Vothu Ghadi): Contains daily wear saris, Paan Veedo (betel leaf), flowers, raw rice, a coconut, sari blouse piece, and Kunkum (vermilion).
  • Plate 2 (Lagna Talee): Contains a grand post-wedding sari, Mangalsutra (gold and coral chain), Paan Veedo, Mogra flowers, raw rice, Kunkum box, ivory comb (or plastic imitation), and the "Bashing" (ornament).

• Entering the Mantap: The bride, adorned with silk, flowers, and gold, is led to the Mantap (wedding altar) by her mother. The Pandit performs a Pooja (prayer) of the Mantap. The bride enters the Mantap with her right foot first.

• Dhaare Mani (Mangalsutra): The bride's family presents the Mangalsutra, which is blessed and inspected by elders before being tied around the bride's neck